Killer, Lover, Pokemon Master...
This is a Professional Wrestling blog.
I really wanted your whole good guy thing to be fun and cool. But I already, 2 weeks later, have to completely take it back.
Cody and Damien are best friends. Cody grows a mustache and you make a gay joke. Damien responds in a socially acceptable way more or less, and you just talk over him in the most sophomoric way possible.
I’m glad Cody is trouncing you verbally. I hope someone trounces you later. Perhaps the hair of Damien Sandow’s beard didn’t rub off on Cody Rhodes when you allege they were kissing. Perhaps when The Rock attacked you at Survivor Series last year, his homophobia rubbed off on you. Could have been Cena too, I don’t know. Right now Cena is too busy being condescending to women, but that doesn’t mean you should be picking up his slack.
Also, preemptive “fuck you” to anyone who thinks I’m taking things too seriously. I’m tired of nonsense like this, especially from people I want to like or have liked in the past.
Also, hey, some people have penises and also like the color pink. Get the fuck over it, every good guy wrestler. I mean, except for John Cena when it’s in the name of cancer in conjunction with a awful charity for jerks.
-Garcian, a queer wrestling fan.
Worst: I’d Like Our Moral Code Back, Please
Okay, so the match ends with John Cena throwing CM Punk sideways toward the ropes (very specifically so) with an Attitude Adjustment and covering him for the three. Punk gets his foot on the ropes at two, but the referee (who looks like an extra from The Outsiders) (the movie, I’m not saying he looks like Syxx) doesn’t see it and awards the match to Cena and Sheamus anyway. He didn’t just “not see it”, he saw his error, had it explained to him, then, instead of restarting the match or showing any sort of responsibility or remorse, just walked away going “welp, sorry, you lost”. Cena and Sheamus leave to go hug (or whatever) and Punk gets stuck “whining” about the loss all the way to the back.
I want to see bad guys get defeated in pro wrestling. I don’t want to see them lose unfairly and complain about it.
I feel like I’ve written a Russian novel’s worth of Worst paragraphs about WWE losing its moral code, but stuff like this is just getting tiresome. Good guys can do whatever they want because the fans like them. Bad guys get cheated but shouldn’t complain about it, because they’re bad guys. It doesn’t make sense. Back in the long long ago, that foot-on-the-ropes finish was to either get you excited for a guy you like winning only to have it snatched way by reality (or worse, by a guy who put his foot on the ropes AFTER the three and pretended like the ref missed it, because he’s a scumbag) or to give the guy you like sympathy for a rematch. With this and the Sheamus match from SummerSlam, it’s become a thing for bad guys to complain about, because ONLY PEOPLE YOU BOO CAN FEEL AS THOUGH THEY’VE BEEN WRONGED. Everybody else has to just move on and challenge the guy who cheated them to a MATCH HERE TONIGHT~!!
Fan favorites are the ones who should be generating crowd sympathy. They should be people we want to see win, because they’ve been wronged in some way, or treated badly by someone, or underestimated. They’re Dusty Rhodes, a common man trying to take wrestling’s top prize from rich socialite cheating prick Ric Flair and his gaggle of asshole friends. The way things are set up now, WWE heels are the ones who attempt to generate sympathy, and WWE babyfaces are guys who smile and wave and clap and just destroy everyone. You know why? Because modern wrestling audiences are callous as f**k, and have no interest in living vicariously through a good person … they want to live vicariously through someone who wins all the time and doesn’t think too much. Were you just treated unfairly? WHY ARE YOU STILL TALKING ABOUT IT, THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME
It’s a devaluation of class, intelligence and integrity, and a pretty sorrowful example of how WWE has taught its audience to think what WWE does is what’s best. WWE doesn’t play fair, they just win all the time and do whatever they want with whoever they want. Are you complaining about it at all? Shut up, loser!"
So there’s really no definitive winner still between them.
that’s a hard trigger to pull. Like Austin/Rock. The only real clean win I can remember between them was their last major encounter at WM19, and Austin was on his way out.
That thing with The Rock had to be one of the worst and most problematic things the WWE has ever done since the last time they did something with The Rock.
Also, don’t say you love women when you keep making implications that having female qualities are negative aspects. You pig.
Okay, that last one might have been too much to ask.
Shows just how this match means EVERYTHING to Cena and The Rock is all “lol fruity pebbles” about it.
It’s bullshit, and like I said, I hope Cena beats the fuck out of him.
John Cena > Dalai Lama (and The Rock, incidentally).
It’s just so fucking weird to see all of those names together. subliminal messages can get weird sometimes.
I’m really interested in seeing Cena’s char coming unglued.
For once I feel like his character is consistent with who they’re presenting him as. This isn’t chair death to Woi Cena, or Mexican Killer Cena, this is the Cena I’ve always wanted them to give me, I think.
One that actually is the good person he presents himself to be.
It helps that it’s Roddy talking to him. Roddy gets the point of this segment.
That was one of Cena’s best segments.
And realize that you complaining about there “not being enough answers” and what have you is part of the deal.
First of all, you should want to be a Little Jimmy and should feel pleased that WWE is baiting you along like this.
Second of all, it is perfectly unreasonable to ask a completely separate entity to his this sweet spot that is unique to you.
Oh, and Punk doesn’t need the championship. We should be concerned with him being in compelling stories, and he is certainly in one. Why are we so hung up on championships and win/loss records?
Watching all of this Jeff Hardy reminds me off all the stupid things he was saying and doing just 9 months or so ago.
Then I think about where everybody is now. Matt and Jeff aren’t on tv and CM Punk is about to headline one of the biggest WWE ppvs as the WWE champion with one of the biggest stars of all time in John Cena.
I feel that the last time we see CM Punk, when the time comes that he finally disappears into the Chicago night for good, it will be in a way appropriate for him. Either getting his comeuppance or receiving the respect he deserves in some fashion. Whatever it may be, it will certainly be better than the last we saw of Matt teaming with Chris Harris or Jeff Hardy at Victory Road.
This isn’t a petty post, this isn’t a ‘let’s all laugh at the Hardys again’ joke, but I think there is something to be said about people that make the right decisions in their lives. And that isn’t a statement on drug use, it’s a statement on life.
But who knows, maybe the Hardys did make the best decisions for themselves. Maybe it’s best that they got away, even in shame and embarrassment. We’ll see.
In all, it’s nice to see people like Punk that worked hard and stuck it out eventually getting what they want. Especially in a world of Hardy Boys and people like them. What is happening now is a validation of the decisions Punk has made in his life. He stayed true to himself and was a success by being himself, for better or worse. It is an inspiration to people like me that want to do things in their own way. Jeff Hardy also was a success with his own approach to life and to a significantly lesser extent, Matt, but then something happened.
I don’t think we’ll have to say the same thing about CM Punk. I don’t think we’ll ever get a “Where are they now?” article about CM Punk. I don’t think CM Punk will be opening car dealerships or doing rent a center commercials. I don’t think CM Punk will make a series of unapologetic embarrassing public displays. I think CM Punk is someone we can hang out hats on.
There is a risk in proclaiming a wrestler as your favorite. It takes a piece of your heart. It makes what happens to them later all the more difficult. I think what is great about guys like CM Punk is that we don’t have to worry about all that. He may hurt our feelings, but we will never have to be apologist for him or for liking him. In that respect, he’s a lot like John Cena.
I think WWE is done with paper heroes like Jeff Hardy, Ultimate Warrior, Hulk Hogan, etc. All of those guys have let their fans down in a lot of ways. Shawn Michaels used to be that guy. We have champions now that might finally kill the saying that you should never meet your heroes. We have heroes we can proudly claim allegiance to.
And so I apologize to the people that had a hero in the Hardys and have to hold your hand over your face during every ridiculous youtube video. I apologize to the people that had a hero in Randy Orton and have to cover your ears when he goes on an ill advised verbal bowl movement.
There are heroes. But sometimes there’s a man…sometimes there’s a man.
My hero is CM Punk.
“There is only one success — to be able to spend your life in your own way.” — Christopher Morley
Get this man a Pepsi.